Just go away and leave me alone while I scream.

Have you ever been punched in the face?

I haven't.  But that is what this feels like.

These waves of emotional turmoil have plagued me for too long.  I'm sick of it.  And I've been fighting for some sense of normalcy for a long time.
I thought I had a handle on things.
Until tonight.

I can be as logical as possible.
I know it's hormonal, which makes it sound casual and it is anything but.
To call this PMS is like saying Hiroshima was a firecracker.
I can explain it until I'm blue in the face, but it doesn't make it any easier.

It's like being punched in the face.

A sudden feeling of dread, loneliness, and hopelessness drops down upon me without warning.
I can't stop crying.
I can't stop shaking.
And I just want to scream for it to go away.

Blah Blah pumpkin blah

Is there nothing more disappointing than spending 1 1/2 hours cooking a dinner that turns out not so good?
Well perhaps there is, but I digress.

I was absolutely starving tonight and ready to cave and eat some Ellios pizza.  But I decided last night that I wanted pork chops with pumpkin sauce.  So I found a recipe on-line over my lunch break and stopped at the store on the way home.
It's not horrible...just not at all what I was expecting.
So I won't be sharing that recipe.

But here is one that I HAVE tried and loved.
I told my friend Rie that it was for pork, but the recipe calls for beef.  But I bet it would be just as good on a big ole piece o'pork.

Asian Tomato Beef (A Campbell's recipe)

Ingredients:
2 cans Campbell's Condensed Tomato Soup
1/3 c soy sauce
1/3c vinegar
11/2 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp ground black pepper
*1 boneless beef round steak (3 3 1/2 pounds), cut into strips
6 c broccoli flowerets
Hot cooked rice

Directions:
Stir the soup, soy sauce, vinegar, garlic powder, black pepper and beef in a 3 1/2 quart slow cooker
Cover and cook on LOW for 7-8 hours or until the beef if fork tender.
Stir in the broccoli.  Increase the heat to HIGH.  cover and cook for 15 minutes or until the broccoli is tender-crisp.  Serve the beef mixture with the rice.


Now I don't bother with the broccoli/rice bit.  Unless that's what I'm in the mood for.  I've served this "as is" with other side dishes and it's just as yummy.  I also don't cut my meat.  I basically throw the whole slab in the crock pot and forget it until it's supper time.

*I'm almost positive that pork would be just as yummy as the beef.


I'm also making up for my crappy dinner by trying these.
They are cooling now, so I'll let you know how they turn out.
So what's for dinner at your house this week?

The worthy

Conversations about anal leakage.
Blinking because we're mammals.
Yeti Jack.
Three hour phone calls about music.
Running down George Street.
Seamen, not semen.
Dollar Store trips.
Humpty Dance
Coffee over Twilight.
Suicidal ghosties.
BAAAAAAAL.
Poof.


These are just a handful of things that I think about when shit is hitting the fan.
My friends are my family...and I love them.
Mostly because they are just as weird as I am.
Or maybe it's because they accept me for who I am and embrace my weirdness.

Shit has hit the fan this week.  Details aren't necessary.  But it's been a rough week for my brain and my heart.  So I go to my happy place and think about my friends and how awesome they make me feel.

So if you read the list above and something looks familiar...
Well, thanks.
Thanks for being worthy enough for my heart.