From the Ashes

For Valerie, and me

The Power of a Compliment

It's no secret that I am different, weird, unusual, odd...whatever you want to call it. And it's also no secret that this fact mostly doesn't bother me. I take pride in the fact that I am not a folllower; that I dance to beat of my own drum. But what most people might not know is that there is a teeny tiny part of me that knows, what sets me apart from others is also what makes me feel lonely. It's not easy for me to meet people who 'get me'. Sure they think I'm funny, or think I'm cool because I can shrug off others' cross-eyed looks. All of that is great. But I've spent a life-time trying to find people who I can truly connect with. Although I have crossed paths with a few kindred spirits, it has not been easy. And over the last few years it's been less easy. I've lost friends, loved ones, and a part of myself that made me feel special. I've been fighting through tears and lonliness to get that back. And something happened the other day that pushed me weeks ahead of schedule, maybe even months! Someone gave me a compliment. The words were simple; there was no sweeping background music swelling to the point of tears. Just a simple..."I like you" Someone who I considered an acquaintance told me they liked me. That they liked my sense of humor, that I 'get it'. I smiled, thanked this person and went back to work. But like the Grinch, my heart swelled immensely. I had forgotten, in my search for kindreds, that there may be others out there searching for the same thing I am. For someone to understand them, laugh with them and maybe be their friend along the way. Now I don't know for sure if this person falls into that category, but somehow, knowing that I'm not alone makes me feel less...lonely. Which is pretty fucking awesome, if you ask me. And just in case that certain person is reading this... "Thank you, you rock, and I really do think I have super powers!"

Music I Love

The people who are lucky enough to know me, know that music is very important to me. I love it all! So I wanted to share my newest, awesomest find. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse Soundtrack. So far my favoritest songs are: Heavy In Your Arms by Florence and the Machine My Love by Sia Chop and Change by The Black Keys Let's Get Lost by Bat for Lashes w/ Beck The Line by Battles The rest of it is really good too...but I tend to focus in on certain songs first. I've been listening to it at work and in the car so it won't be long before I know all the words. Check it out!